laal

humne to unse dil laga kr
jee ka janjaal kr diya
itna soche h unke bare main
sala hilla hilla k loda b laal
kr diya

laundiya 16 saal ki

Aao bachcho tumhe dikhayen ladki 16 saal ki,
Mote-mote boobs uske, chut badi kamaal ki,
Jaliyaan wala baag dekho waha khadi thi chhoriyaa,
Chodne wale chod rahe the bicha-bicha k boriyaa,
Yeh mat pucho kisne kheli waha chut se holiyaan,
Laude to sidhe khade the latak rahi thi goliyaan,
Aazadi ki us ladaai me main bhi waha dauda tha,
1 haath me tel ki bottle 1 haath me lauda tha

koshish toh karo

Hoth se hoth mila kar to dekho,
naye logon se rishta bana kar to dekho.
Boobs bra mein chupane se kya faayda,
kisi ke haathon mein inhe thama kar to dekho.
Ungli karne se kab tak hongi tumhari khushiyan puri,
Ek baar lund aazma kar to dekho
Aasma bhi niche utar aayega tumhari chut dekhne, ek baar apni skirt
utha kar to dekho.
Waada karte hain chut ko surang bana denge tumhari,
Ek baar humse marwa kar to dekho..

arz kiya hai....

Pyar kismat hai koi khwab nahi,
Ye wo khel Hai jisme sab kamyab nahi,
Jinhe ishq ki panah mili wo kuch hi log hai..
Or
Jinke lavde lag gaye unka to hisab nahi

vati

The Young Brahmin asked,"Is it true, that your daughter has all the
good qualities and pleasing looks ?"
The old brahmin answered,"Haan! More that that, she is Sundara Vati and
PadmaVati !"
"But, can she cook and keep house ?"Asked the young man.
"Oh yes, she is Dharma Vati!"answered the old man.
"Now, can she sew? asked the young man.
"Oh yes . . . . yes, she can not only sew, but she is Kala Vati
!"answered the old man.
"What about her education?"asked the young man.
"She is Vidya Vati !"answered the old man.
And theVedas?"asked the young man.
"Oh yes . . . . yes, she is Veda Vati !"answered the old man.
The young man is very happy to find the perfect bride and gets married to her.
Two days later, he comes back with his newly married bride in town. The old
Brahminis surprised. He asks,"What happened, my son?"Why do you look so upset ?
The young man says,"Well sir, you told me that your daughter is
already a Sundara Vati, Padma Vati, Dharma Vati, Kala Vati, Vidya Vati
and a Veda Vati ?"
"Yes, my son - I certainly did"replies the old man.
But Sir - you forgot to tell me that, she is also already a'Garbha Vati'

english girl

Banta's wife, Preeto, goes toEnglandto attend a two-week, company
training session. Banta drives her to the airport and wishes her to
have a good trip.
Preeto answers,'Thank you honey, what would you like me to bring for you?'
Banta laughs and says,'An English girl !!!
Preeto kept quiet and left.
Two weeks later Banta picks her up in the airport and asks,'So, honey,
how was the trip?'
'Very good, thank you.'
'And, what happened to my present?'
'Which present?'
'What I asked for, the English girl?!'
Oh, that! Well, I did what I could, now we have to wait a few months
to see if its a girl !!!

machar

MUNNABHAI:ABE CIRCUIT, TU BHAUT SHANA BANTA HAI , JARA BATA MACHHAR SE
AIDS KYON NAHI FAILTA?
CIRCUIT:SIMPLE BHAI.. MACHHAR SUCK KARTA HAI... FU*K NAHIN KARTA

call girl

Santa Ko Ek Sunder Si Ladki Pasand Aa Gayi, Aur Usne Us Se Baatchit Shuru Ki
Ladki Asal Mein Ek Call Girl Thii Par Ye Baat Santa Ko Pata Nahi Thhi
Dono Mein Prem Pyar Kuch Din Chala Aur Ladki Bhi Santa Ke Bholepan Se
Imress Ho Ke Usko Pyar Karne Lagi
Ek Din Satna Ne Usko Bol Diya Ki Mere Se Shadi Kar Le.
Ab Bechari Ladki Pareshan Ho Gayi Ki Isko To Pahli Rat Mein Hi Pata
Lag Jayega Ki Main Badi Buri Tarha Se Chudi Hun
Ladki Ne Apni Saheli Se Ye Baat Discuss Ki, Saheli Ne Idea Diya
Saheli: "Jaisi Hi Vo Tere Andar Dale Jor Jor Se Chikhna Shuru Kar Dena
Aur Rone Lag Jana"
Ladki: "Haan Ye Baat Thik Hai, Is Se Usko Lagega Ki Main Virgin Hun"
Ye Soch Ke Ladki Ne Santa Se Shadi Kar Li
Suhagrat Wale Din Santa Ne Jaisi Hi Uske Ander Dala Ladki Chikhne Lag Gayi
Santa Ne Thoda Sa Aur Ander Dala To Ladki Zor Zor Se Rone Ka Drama
Karne Lag Gayi
Santa Ne Pucha: "Janu Kya Hua Rone Kyu Lag Gayi?"
Ladki: "Bada Dard Ho Raha Hai Ji, Meri Jaan Nikle Ja Rahi Hai"
Ye Sun Ke Santa Bhi Zor Zor Se Rone Lag Gaya
Ladki Ne Hairan Hoke Santa Se Pucha
Ladki: "Arrey Aap Kyu Rone Lag Gaye?"
Santa: "Bhonsdi Ki, Mere To Tatte Tak Ander Chale Gaye Hai Isliye Ro Raha Hun"

.condom.

Santa Bade Pareshan Haal Mein Apne Familly Doctor Ke Pass Gaya
Santa: "Dr. Saab, Mene Hamesha Apni Biwi Se Condom Laga Ke Sex Kiya
Hai Fir Bhi Uske 3 Bachhe Ho Gaye"
Dr Hairan Ho Ke: "Achha?? Kamal Hai Yaar. Vese Tum Condom Lagate Kaisi Ho"
Santa: "Jitna Condom Lund Pe Chadta Hai, Utna Chada Ke Baki Ka Aage Se
Kaat Deta Hun"

Baba Saxidas Ke Pass Log Tarha Tarha Ke Sawal Leke Aate Thhe Ese Hi Ek Din Unka Ek Naya Bhakt Aya Aur Unke Charan Saparsh Karke Bola Bhakt: “Baba Ji, Aap Mahan Hai, Aapne Bade Logo Ko Gyan Diya Hai, Mere Bhi Ek Question Ka Hal Dijiye Na” Baba Muskurake Bole: “Jarur Denge Bachha, Bolo Kya Hai Tumhari Duvidha?” Bhakt: “Baba Ji, Ye Kalpana Aur Haqeeqat Mein Kya Farak Hai?” Baba Ji Ne Kuch Socha Aur Bole: “Bachha, Hum Answer To De Denge Par Iske Liye Tumhe 2 Kam Karne Honge.” Bhakt: “Baba Ji Kya?” Baba Ji: “Pahle Apne Ghar Ja Aur Apni Biwi Se Puch Ki Agar Tujhe Amitabh Bhachan 50 Lakh Rs De To Kya Tu Uske Sath Sirf Ek Raat So Legi?” Bhakt Ne Socha Ye Kya Question Hai Is Se Kaisi Pata Lagega Ki Kalpana Aur Haqeeqat Mein Kya Farak Hai, Par Fir Bhi Ghar Gaya Aur Puch Ke Aya Baba Ne Pucha: “Kya Jawab Mila?” Bhakt: “Ji, Usne Khush Hoke Bola Ki Wow 50 Lakh Rs Ek Rat Ke Mil Jayenge, Vo Bhi Amitabh Bhachan Jaise Celebrity Ke Sath Sone Ka, Tum To Sari Zindagi Din Rat Naukri Karo Tab Bhi Itna Nahi Kama Sakte, Main Ek Rat Amitabh Ke Sath Sone Ko Tyar Hun” Baba Ji: “Hmm, Ja Ab Apni Beti Se Puch Ke Aa Ki, Agar Usko 50 Lakh Rs Mile Aur Ek Rat Shahrukh Khan Ke Sath Sone Ka Moka Mile To So Legi” Bhakt Pareshan Hua Ki Ye Sab Kya Chakkar Hai Fir Bhi Baba Ke Sath Bahas To Kar Nahi Sakta Thha, Ghar Pahuncha Aur Beti Se Bhi Puch Ke Aa Gaya Aur Baba Ko Bola Bhakt: “Baba Ji, Vo To Apne Bed Se Uchhal Gayi Aur Boli, Kyu Nahi Dad Shahrukh Ke Sath Sone Ka 50 Lakh Milega To, Main Ameer Aur Apne Friend Mein Famous Ho Jaungi” Bhakt Ne Pareshan Ho Ke Pucha: “Baba In Sab Baato Ka Mere Sawal Se Kya Lena Dena Hai” Baba Ji: “Samajh Bachha, Kalpana Mein Tere Ghar 1 Carore Rs Pada Hai, Aur Haqeeqat Mein Tu 2 Randiyo Ke Sath Rah Raha Hai“